Thursday, December 15, 2005

Consumer Advisory - Video Game suckage

After reading a couple of reviews and hearing that this game has some profanity I was all for it. Profanity + video game = excellent start. And for much of the game this has proved to be quite a solid little game. The story is about a team that starts out in the cellar and climbs back into the big to take on division 1 powerhouse the NY Nightmare. There is some piss poor cutscenes and scripts involving your first overall rookie & cheerleader, a nearly washed up veteran, an asshole (as the game calls him when you first hear about him) a freaky owner and a corrupt Liberal mayor. Well ok, I added the Liberal part. Haw Haw. Just so you know LT himself is in the game as...well....another asshole.

So the game rolls along nicely. Going through the scrub (bottom) division on the way up the ladder. I choose the rookie to be a HB (or running back). So I would go into the games I formation (my rage has me forgetting the games name for it) and select a HB run off tackle to the right with a full back lead. So bang, in scrub division I'd call the play, the tackle NEVER, EVER, blocks the DE accross from him, the FB happily runs right by and bam the HB is tackled for a loss of two. Alright, you say, time to train the tackle and FB on blocking. SURE. why not. So I do. I'm presently, in division 1, with a well trained tackle and FB. Run the same play. Same result cept now my backup running back is out for 5 games with a shatter wrist or some such nonsense. OK fine.

I remember playing blitz in the arcade a few times and I was well aware that the game had catch up AI in it. If it was down suddenly weird shit would happen to contribute to it's return of victory over you. This game is no exception. I do a toss to the right, if I'm down by any points the HB will never drop it, but if I'm up at all in the 4th it's almost assurd to be a fumble at some point during the toss or run. Passes that will connect in triple coverage in the first quarter can be tossed to a open guy all alone who'll promptly bonk (yes bonk, no other word for it) the pass into the air, bonk it off another of my WR and then into the hands of a safety or DB. THIS HAPPENS WITH ALARMING REGULARITY.

Ok, so suspension of belief is required. No doubt about it. But, what kills me is that a cartoony, unrealistic video game can become a massively lobsided cartoony video game simply by winning a little bit over it. I like challenges, I don't like to be insulted that a game that previously was being owned by me can come back so dramatically and look like the friggin Baltimore Colts beating up on Lloydminster high school's B team. Pure, suckage.

The choice becomes to trade this turd in and get another game at EB or to wreck the disc so that it can never pollute a PS2 again.

ya ya. Boo hoo. I know.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Entry for this day

I had a ball hockey game tonight. Remember, I'm nearly 30 in a league filled with 18-23 year olds. Picture old and fat vs young and skinny. Slow vs fast. So we start off fast and strong. Taking a 2-0 lead in the game. Considering we've not won a game all season, things are looking up. We are playing strong, moving fast, connecting passes, scoring on flukey shots...things that are imperative to success in such a strange and topsy turvey game. But alas, disaster strikes, I somehow make it down the rink to be the third man in on a fast break, a kindly gentleman from the other team, whom I'd whacked in the corner mere seconds earlier bodies me, Mr Red Helmet, which results (predictably in my opinion) of him bouncing off me and stumbling forward. No biggy, however, I managed to step on Mr. Red Helmet's heel causing him to tumble to the hockey surface like a weight watchers dieter diving for a falling donut. This all happens very quickly, and I'm ready to turn around and head back to the blueline/centre area where I belong. Until that magical sound of the ref's whistle "Tweet" (oh ya, you got any better written sound effects??). My first thought was maybe he got a penalty for bodying me which apparently is illegal in this league. Ref yells "Orange, number 9, interference". No sooner does he say that then "WTF" escapes my lips. Suddenly, I have a million things to say. Somewhere in my brain something twigs about me not liking it when players complain to the ref and I refrain from a profanity laced diatribe questioning the refs mental capacity/sanity/ability to ref blind midget peewee hockey. My team calls me a goon (good naturally of course) as I take my spot in the lonely penalty box. Naturally they score and the TSN turning point occurs as we wind up losing 6-4. To top it off later in the game I roll my ankle and now that the adrenalin has worn off I'm hobbling about.

BUT WAIT, there is more.

So I'm driving home, feeling pretty down about losing and playing such a bad game (although, I did get to double punch someone in the head...Penalty free...go figure) and I go to slow down at a light, the ass end of my little truck skids and I punch it. I'm sure I saw a flash. Oh, fiddle de deeeee I say. That'll be like 500 bucks, thanks red light camera. Not more than 3 minutes later another light turns yellow, having learned previously about sliding I just hit it. I see another flash. Now I don't know if those were real flashes or imagined, but I'm running scared. Heading down Calgary trail at 53 ave, the friggin don't walk thing is flashing and I'm on the brake. I come to a stop just as the light turns yellow. WITHOUT FAIL, there is a cop waiting there heading across westward on 53 ave. Just staring at me, wondering how much crack I must have done to be stopped before the light turns yellow. He looks at my truck (presently with only one working headlight) and moves on. Must have been a donut run or yet another gang shooting cause he blasts away after checking me out for a few seconds. So, while stopped at the light I say to myself....How does one rehab a twisted ankle. The answer came back instantly "McNuggets." Damn, I was thinking ice pack or maybe rolling a joint.

Hmph.

Short Bits:

- So there's an election on, I did the drive by stalker thing at Laurie Hawn's campaign office. He attracts some good workers who want to say they helped knock off the Deputy Prime Minister.
- Speaking of election, I'm interested, just not to the point that I was before.
- Harpers commercials are done by the same creative ref who gave me the penalty this evening. Pure crap.
- Has anyone promised to pay off like 30-40 billion worth debt per year instead of making the minimum payments. One would think that since times are good to pay that sucker down. Does this not feel like something that would come back and bite us in the ass?
- I sold three cars in one day (I've done that several times before) but this one is different. After feeling all proud of myself, the first deal the guy walks in and gets his deposit back tubing the deal, the second guy is entering bankruptcy and technically it's illegal to apply for more credit, the third guy takes delivery of his vehicle and brings it back the very next night and gives us back the keys. Ahem, fuddle duddle indeed.
- I was sick this weekend, saturday was a mess, cough cold, flu, ebola, bird flu, you name it I had it. Man I felt awful. Sunday I could barely manage 4 hours at offtrack. I even skipped work tuesday to get better. Sorry to all who's parties I missed. It wasn't selfish jerkish stuff, just damn sick. Like sweating profusely with a fever and shivering at the same time sick. Trust me, it's better I wasn't there.
- I enjoyed watching Manning and the Colts take Jacksonville apart. They are fun to watch.
- That House show has made me a fan for life, last night's episode started out at OTB place, and that House dude is just pure rude/funny. "Oh boo hoo" he says. lmao.
- 40 year old virgin is the best movie ever. Period. How it isn't nominated for best picture, best actor, best whatever is beyond me. Oh wait, artsy, not fartsy, stuff wins.
- uhhh, that's it for now.

Later.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Nice Horse

Ok, one of my fav things is horse racing. I'm talking throughbred's not the jiggy joggers. To that end from time to time I'll write about it in this space.

This is one of those times.

A few weeks ago my family friend was in town and he invited me out to the nearby Paddockhurst Stables where his broodmare and unnamed filly are at. The broodmare was as one expects, pregnant to the farms hot stallion Hurricane Center. The yearling was thin and that usual dispropotion between legs and body (ie waiting to grow up and fill out). The young filly is also sired by Hurricane Center.

Later, I got to see the big horse. Hurricane Center himself. A son of the legendary Storm Cat; the same Storm Cat who's stud fee is $500,000. Now I've seen alot of horses in my time but this beast was particularily impressive and made a lasting impression. One would describe him as aggressive, cocky and full of himself. As though he knows he's the king of the farm. I'm weak at judging conformation but it looked fine to me, very muscled and in my opinion he seemed to be of good size for the Alberta race scene. He is a solid looking horse. Here's hoping he gets good results.

We also went and saw Royalty Boy, he was fun to visit, he tried to bite me and wound up nearly missing and getting ahold of my coat. Not sure if he was playing or not after a bit as he didn't seem too interested in letting go. The farmhand said that he's been nipping alot lately so that makes sense I suppose. I said "bad horsey, my coat" but 1500 pds of horse didn't really seem to interested in letting go so I had to yank. Let this be a repeat of a lesson I learned when I was very young. horses bite and it hurts. When I was a little lad (5ish?) I was petting one of the horses that my dad owned while we were at the track, the horse named Big Smoke. I was petting his nose and I remember the horse lowing his head to my leg ( iwas thinking something like what is he doing) and CHOMP. ouch, tears etc. Remember, horses bit and they didn't leave scars on me so I'd look tough for the chicks ;)

So how's that for a non gamling horse racing entry?

Sunday, December 04, 2005

New blog, insomnia strikes..concincidence?

First things first. Guess I should explain where the name of this blog comes from. I used it one day in conversation with a fellow cube dweller over at Marsh, I was refering to the attitude that underwriters used to have towards us broker types. She laughed loudly, and thought that it was a pretty acurate statement.

An update on me:

been playing....ball hockey, the winter league. I'm playing much better as a player since the first futile bigger playing surface days of last summer. I no longer need ice packs on my knees post game and can walk just fine the next day....As long as stairs aren't in the way. I bought some new running shoes from the running room. Man they are good sales people. Did fit me into exactly what I needed though. Kudos to the sales job. Just so you know I made it through the winter league before being injured 9 games, 2 assists. So far in the winter league I'm at 9 games 3 assists. Go me. with this momentum I'll break 100 points some time near 2010. Of course now I'm playing half the game and have been fairly good defensively.....except against #4 of the swashbucklers...damn guy still have nightmares about him scorching me all night long.

been watching....Having cable for the first time in 10 years I find myself watching lots of this silly Mythbusters show on Discovery. REally, really really half assed science, but I do find it entertaining never the less.

been gaming...sadly no. It's on pause for now. I thought about getting an xbox360 but decided to wait and decide what to get once the next playstation lands.

been selling....Well, I'm at 79.5 cars (the .5 is a split commish) in the 8 months that I've done this....but....this past two weeks have been rough, I've only sold 1 car and that was today. I had 3 splits though in that time. I'm getting better though, I think next year could be huge for me.

been at the new hut....I love it. well done Axio.

been doing anything remotely interesting? uh. no. not really. My life is at work now, work 10 days on 3 off, of those 3 off I typically work one or two of those days.

Things I think I think....
- Horse racing rules. It's one of those things where I wish other people really understood the fun of it and it was more popular...but then again, I'm happy it's not.
- I'd hate to see Brett Farve retire after such an awful season
- Watched some of the sunday night game tonight, LT is a machine, but the color commentator was right, his full back is worth every penny.
- I think GM is going to enter bankruptcy protection in the next year to year and a half. They came 40 minutes away frmo bankruptcy in the early 90's. They were literally sitting by the fax machine waiting for notice from a bank on a due loan which would have pushed them into chapter 11.
- I think the new nhl bores me as much as the old nhl
- I think at age 29 I might just have to get my wisdom teeth taken out
- President's Choice beer, pilsner variety isn't to shabby and is damn cheap. I feel like I'm one step away from drinking it out of a brown bag though
- I made a puking pumpkin this year at halloween, I'll post a pic for ya sometime in the future
- U2 is a fantastic band, but Green Day is probably my favorite right now
- I dislike telus greatly. I'm not too thrilled with Shaw either. Vonage so far has been great.
- I've not had a cell phone for quite some time now and I don't miss it in the slightest.
- Does anyone know where a guy can get some decent commercial grade fitness equipment back from lease to a gym? I checked out a few of the home type ones and man are they crappy mccrap.
- I'm enormously jelous of my neighbours, firefighter, 7 days on 7 off. the other a emt 4 on 4 off. sigh. I'm like never off....

bemused